Here are my comments/ crits for each of this week's entries. As always, this is meant as constructive criticism. The work this week was good from everyone.

Scott Flanders- I love these inks. They're full of character and attitude.the design of the bike is a bit simple but, on the plus side, the back end reminds me of the Heli-bike from M.A.S.K. I am having a bit of a problem with the way the rider is sitting, as it looks like his tail would be getting nearly broken by the angle it rests at. Still, the piece has that desirable attitude from the inks and posture of the figure otherwise that fits the notion of "Biker."

Chris Burdett- I can't stop chuckling at this one. The big, relatively macho dragonborn on that little ROFLscooter is hilarious. Craft-wise your pencils are gorgeous. No muddy forms anywhere, the border lines all sell their forms clearly, and just enough shading to keep it from getting too cartoony. (actually it reminds me a little of some of Jeff Laubenstien's old Shadowrun stuff :) )

MuYoung Kim- I like this piece, but I don't think it's successful at selling the Biker nearly as well as the bike. (The bike is pure gold btw- very Akira/ Empire of the Rising Sun-ish.) The figure is turned away completely and the proximity of the blade and the face make it hard to even see he's got his head turned. I'm seeing some problem areas with tones that are too close together- the reds on and around the front tire, and especially the helmet and the bike behind it. (part of that may be the round form next to it that is part of the bike as well and the tangent it forms with the rear diagonal.

Liz Clarke- Of the two I like the tiefling better, mainly due to his outfit being more visually interesting and the bike's design carrying more character. One the other hand the pose and expression of your deva girl carry a bit more character than his stiff up-and-down pose. I'm not sure the backgrounds are really serving the figures either, especially in the tiefling piece. He and the bike aren't "popping" very strongly from the background. Your deva is "popping nicely, partly due to the nice yellow/ purple contrast of the fuel tank, arm, and sky. However, her right arm is getting lost against the similar light tone behind it.

David Miles- I like the idea of the aqua-choppers, but something about these just feels too much like boat, and not enough like bike. The parcel of loot on the middle ride also looks very overbalancing in a piece that reads and simply rendered, but serious (That is NOT an insult btw. I LIKE simple clean rendering.) I also had a bit of trouble picking out that the riders were halflings at first, given the non-tolkien proportions of D&D halflings.

Claudio Pozas- Nice clean inks, and your goliath gal is hot. Watch the proportions on her pelvis and legs though, they're looking short. Also his hand on her side looks in an odd place for where you have his shoulder. only complaint I have about the bike is it reads as more American southwestern to me than mountain-y. Most likely due the the cow skull carrying that association.

Heather Hudson- I generally like this piece, but I have two areas that are bugging me. The headlight/ front end of the bike just isn't reading very clearly to me. I honestly can't tell what you're going for with it (some kind of bestial mouth? also, his hair is too saturated and shaped a bit oddly, giving me the idea that it's a big beret in the thumbnail. (that one's a minor quibble)

Phillipe St. Gerard- This one has a great cartoony feel to it, reminding me of some of the lighter-hearted WoW-related art out there. The "log rocket" shape is great, and I like the exaggerating of 4E gnome spiky hair.

Rafi Adrian Z- I like this one. The deva elements of the bike are subtle but read well. I think pushing the bike a bit darker might have helped it pop from the similar background tone a bit more than just the pencilwork alone. I generally like your deva girl too, though some of your brushwork to lay in specular on her legs and under her right arm seem too heavy next to the delicate and consistent washes of the rest of the piece.

J. Lonnee- I like the very 60's England feel to the bike and her helmet. It feels like a bit of Avengers influence (though that could be her riding suit, which screams Emma Peel catsuit (to me anyway.) I do wish the suit were rendered to the same level as the bike though- the gloves and thights especially read very sketchy.

Mike Faille- This is a great design and my favorite after Chris'. the bike designs scream goblin and dwarven. Your linework is clean, and your dwarf driver looks great. I have to wonder (and others have mentioned part of this in the ArtOrder comments) about the expression of the girl, given her lack of pants.

And, though it isn't actually finished, it's only fair I show mine so others can crit it if they feel so inclined (click to embiggen. )



Ideally, I'll get it done this weekend after the vampire piece for the current challenge.

Got the drawing for the Tiefling biker girl part of this week's challenge at ArtOrder :)

I think she looks pretty good. Hope I have time to get to paints. (Two paid pieces to finish first.)

Exchange Concept Challenge Crits

(Or, Wall-of-text 2: Electric boogaloo)

Again, the following is all meant as constructive criticism. I'm not flaming anyone or calling anyone a bad artist. Please don't take offense.


Dana Henderson- Both pieces have a really nice badass quality to them, especially the second (Scott Flanders' silhouette.) That said, I think the Flanders' piece is the very successful at conveying the silhouette to the viewer. I don't have a big problem with re-posing the characters, but by turning Jorge's girl to the side, all that indicated detail in his drawing is hidden, and there were interesting shapes indicated in there I'd have liked to have seen rendered out. Even so there are some details from the silhouette I can see didn't make it across, like the way her hair is loose in Jorge's piece, and tied in your render.

Piya Wannachaiwong - There are some really cool elements to your construct here, starting with the negative space face in the mask. What I would love to see is more texture over the whole figure though, and more confidence in your brushwork. The figure as a whole has a certain soft-edged finish that doesn't serve the piece so well. The flesh and metal and cloth should read as distinct from each other texturally, which at the moment isn't quite happening except on the blade of the sword.

Liz Clarke- I'm guessing this is a scan of actual paints? The paper texture here actually hurts the piece by imposing itself over your brushwork and giving evry element a same-ness. I'm seeing some lovely brushwork under it getting drowned out. As far as the figure goes, it's a solid translation from the silhouette, though the second staff on her back seems to be placed oddly. Only the top part of it is visible, which breaks a shape element of the silhouette.

Scott Purdy- (oo ee oo ah ah, ting tang walla walla bing bang) This piece is great, Scott. One of my favorites of the bunch. My only thought would be to have the bird pecking in a hole in the head, since it kinda looks like he's helping himself to some grey matter in the silhouette. Also maybe just a bit more fill lighting on the face. Just a little, so we can see his features a bit better.

Christopher Burdett- This makes me chuckle. There's a great bit of humor in the heavy, Knobbly-bit covered armor on a short figure already, but the smile sells it. Something like "Yeah, it take three hours to go to the can and my face is a scarred mess, but we get GREAT dental."

J. Lonee- Good solid render. Would like to have seen the contrast pushed a little more. I'm also picking up a hint of color in the face and rifle stock that I would either push up a bit more or desaturate out and have a pure mono piece. Maybe a little stronger texture separation between the wood of the rifle and the bayonet?

Claudio Pozas- I almost think this would have looked better without any shading, just as clean linework. The shading you've introduced has the clear "runny liquid metal" look of the Photoshop smudge tool to it, and it pulling attention away from what is otherwise a cool design. This would have also forced you to render out the belt design and engraving areas, which right now are more just indicated than really laid in.

Justin Orlando- I love all the textures you've put into this, unfortunately, it's reading very flat to me. I think it needs the lighting pushed more to help define the underlying volumes and shapes. Otherwise he's a cool design with some nice African inferences on the helm (which I think we don't see enough of in fantasy art.)

Mike Faille- The character design is interesting, and the marker-style rendering is visually interesting. It also contributes to some problems I see though in terms of translating Dana's silhouette.The messy "outside the lines" style you've chosen has made some of the negative spaces in the silhouette read as filled, taking away from the nice crescent shape in the silhouette where it crosses the torso. Also, though I appreciate the effort to redraw the figure, some of the proportional changes, and smoothing of protruding bits, changes the character of the figure from the silhouette to your render. Not in a bad way per se, but still different.

Heather Hudson- Nothing really "wrong" here. (well, except that we can't see his tail. quibble that.) This is just me, but something about digital wash over pencil just rubs me wrong, and I've never been able to figure what it is. Mantal miswire on my part. this is a solidly rendered piece, and a Dragonborn in plate is never a bad thing and I should shut up and move on to the next piece.

MuYoung Kim- Undead Cyber-nazi is a cool villian concept right there.As Mr. Schindehette said, it's a great translation of J. Lonnee's silhouette. That said, maybe just a bit cleaner rendering? Some areas like the belt, boots, and the fur are looking rushed.

Michael Lavoie- I was hoping some brave soul would take on Christopher Burdett's non-humanoids. Beautifully rendered bugger. I do think you oversimplified the creature from the silhouette though. Your beauty is more snake-like, where Christopher's is more undulating mass of tendrils lifting themselves off the ground.

Thom Scott- (yes, only fair I post-mortem my own work too, so from now on I will.) I should have spent some more time on the horns- the texture is close to what I was going for, but still kinda rough. The bits on her back are fading a bit, and they're good and strong in Jorge's silhouette.Not sure how to fix that, but it bugs me. The crystal texture is selling ok on the horns, but not so much on the ends of the staff, and not at all on the widget near her right "hand." Lost the bit of negative space behind her face, really wanted her head to seem partially hollow. Happy with the overall cloth rendering for once. Background isn't an oversaturated mess like it was last week.

Chad King- okay, they aren't part of the silhouette at all, but I love those demon/dragon heads.On the figure you stayed good and close to the silhouette, watched for the negative spaces, nice. One thought though- would a light-toned crescent have read better? Otherwise very well done.

Richard Aguirre- I think you also might have been better served leaving this one as linework, The greens you've used read very flat. Part of this is the really strong white glow you've put all over is killing the shading you did put in. That said there's a good solid design here, that deviates from the silhouette, but in good ways- breaking the tangent of the tailtip and spear, adding some interest to the legs and the butt-end of the spear, and adding some visual interest to the smooth lines of the arm and the spearhead.

Kristina Carroll- Nothing "wrong" here. nice solid drawing. Visually interesting.

Joyce Maureira- There are some proportional changes in your re-draw that stick out a bit, especially her right arm seems short, and the firgure as a whole reads a bit shorter. The biggest thing that sticks out to me is the inkwork is overworked on her leathers, and has that lifelessness that doing an entire piece with pen only can get. Some brush inking, and saving your hatching for where it's really demanded would help I think.

Jan Pospisil- You have some gorgeous stuff going on in the detail of his plate pieces, the head of the Lucerne hammer, and the rim of the shield. The cloth is less convincing in places (his left forearm especially.) I'm having some issues with the background as well- there are areas where the tone of the background is very close to the adjacent figure (near the face, near the feet) and the figure recedes a bit at those points.

Tariq Hassan- Nice monochrome render here. Very nice work on the rifle. Maybe some brighter highlights? It reads well against the dark background, but I wonder if it would muddy out aganst a midtone or light backing.

Mike Parr- This is actually quite good when I look at the enlarged image. I think the backgraound you chose does it a disservice in the thumbnail view. I would also up the opacity on the layer the figure sits on, as the background is showing through, and I really don't think the figure needs the extra texture from it.

Dave Studer- I'm nothing resembling a sculptor, but you get points for entering him. I think he looks badass.

Peter Mohrbacher- This is my favorite treatment of Dana's rifleman. Rendered elegantly, with that nice bit of red striping as a key color. A little more detailing would have been nice on the belt holding the pouch up, but the rest looks great, and fits the silhouette like a glove.

Michael Vondracek- I love the detailing on the cloth, especially the upper skirt. I also think you got a more successful effect on the head of the staff than I did. Good solid piece.

Cyril Van Der Haegen- hehe, I knew it looked like the bird was having a snack. Wonderfully creepy. And very well executed, nothing to remark on really.


Until next time (probably two weeks, I suck at environment pieces.)

-Fuu

Variations on a Theme Crits (TLDR version)

The following are crits for the other entries in this week's Concept challenge at http://artorder.blogspot.com/

(please note this is an attempt to provide constructive crits. Please don't take anything below as overly negative)

Nick Egberts: While I love the rendering style on the piece and the overall design of the armor, I think the three variants are a little too close to each other thematically. I actually have to take a fairly close look to pick out the differences between the lightest suit to the heaviest, And if I squint, the silhouettes and hightlights/ shadows look very similar for all three. On the good side, I see some gorgeous detail in the rendering of the leather and plates.


Claudio Pozas: The thing that immediately jums at me is that there are parts (the middle figure's chain shirt, The engraving on the right figure's plate) that are far more detailed than the rest of the piece. They also have that pasted-in texture look in parts, especially the chain shirt and the pattern on the breastplate. The simpler rendering of the cloth elements seems sparse in comparison. I'd have loves to see some decorative tooling on the leather elements and the plate shoulders at least.Oddly, the chain suit has the most "Eladrin" feel to my eye though.


RC Torres: I'm seeing a significantly higher amount of tlc given to the plate and gear bits than the cloth, which is making the cloth bits seem a bit neglected. I do like the basic design and silhouette of the left figure though. It has a nice administrator/ high beureaucrat feel to it. The center has something of a cultist/ clergy feel, but not as emphatic as the left does. The third figure has the beginnings of a high priest feel, but the shoulders are so large, they detract for me.
MuYoung Kim: I like that you went with variations by time period. The Leathers on the ancient figure have indications of some really nice detail if it were taken to a fully rendered piece. I like the powered armor design as well, though I have one quibble- The shape of the weapon is very interesting and it seems a shame to not have it rendered out as well.

Tiziano Baracchi: There is some wonderful rendering here, I just wish the underlying figure wasn't twisted in such an odd way.The leather/ cloth suit is selling the nature theme through the edge shapes nicely (though I'd love to see the tooling from the shoulder extended to the rest of the leather.) The half plate is an interesting arrangement, and I love the metal overlays on the kilt.The Full plate figure is well-rendered, though the plates themselves are plain. I do love the helm though, even though visibility would be awful from inside it, it has a lovely alien look to it.


Dana Henderson: Three rock-solid Japanese-influences suits. I especially like the center suit, with it's faceless demon look.


Jorge Lacera: Minor quibble- your figures aren't the same pose. That said, The armor designs are lovely, and I like that you spnt time on weapon design as well. (I adore the glowing purple sword.) I do notice that you are concentrating almost entirely on the thighs, torso and head in your rendering, and in the middle figure especially it leaves the areas you didn't concentrate on to be very sketchy by comparison.


Mike Faille: mm, linework. I used to be an Inker ages ago, so I like when someone bucks the trend and submits line. That said, your work looks very graphic and isn't taking advantage of the character good linework can bring to a piece. I like the designs, but would love to see you use color to help break up the forms into distinct elements, as the tone overlays really don't bring that much range.


Ruth Kim: I like these, especially the plate suit, though I think the pose isn't really serving the characterization well. I like that some thought went into the weapons as well as the armor as well. I think there's a certain sketchiness to your strokes that makes we think you might be working smaller than would be best for you (which I used to do as well. As a rule though with digital, if you have the time, bigger is usually better-let's you get as tight as you need to.)


Tim Terrengal: I'm seeing two things. First, the good- You are doung a good job with rendering individual textures for leather, metal and so on. But, and I'm afraid this is the bad, The three figures are reading very flat and in places pasted together. I'm seeing a lot of too-smooth edges that yell selection path, as well as lighting coming from very inconsistent directions.
Scott Flanders: You took the same approach I did- three classes. But, what I notice is that all three are wearing almost the axact same armor save for color, shield, and one having a helm on. As a color study this would be good, but it doesn't show any design variation.


Mark Molnar: The three look good. The set looks like a nice progression from a lighter configuration to a heavier set by adding matching pieces. While I usually like more viraety, there's a unity to the three designs that works here.


Heather Hudson: I really like the crumpled leaf design of the plates on your right figure. I'd love to see it in color, hiding in the foliage like camouflage. Also I like how the leather(padded?) on your middle figure looks good and beefy, like it can take a few hits, but still looks like leather.


J Lonnee: waist up on all three limits the amount of figure you have to work with. As it is all you're really giving us is a well rendered torso and head for each figure, and each is essentially identical from the neck down. While I love the tooling and color variations, they're of the same design and aren't conveying any real difference in character to me.


S.C Watson: What character class does Chippendale's hire exactly? although I really didn't see anything outstanding about the armor designs on the other two figures, you get points for humor on the third. I DID like the facial markings and axe design though.


Peter Mohrbacher: Great trio, well differentiated according to which bird they are associated with. Rock solid rendering as usual. My favorite of the entries.


Marco Caradonna: The basic designs are good and solid, but there's not a lot of tonal range which makes it hard to read.


Kristina Carroll: Love these. Would so love to see them painted. My second favorite designs in the group.

Michal Vondracek: Good solid designs. love the Nod to Dark Sun. Only thing I can really knock is the purple you filled the background with is a bit too saturated and is clashing a bit with your dwarves.

Edit: Mr Schindehette commented letting me know MuYoung Kim's piece was loading now, so I went back and added a comment for it.